Balancing hectic work schedules and family life can make it all too easy to push any problems or emotions to the back of our minds. However, sometimes bottling up our worries can do us more harm than good. The phrase ‘a problem shared is a problem halved’ is testament to this and that’s why addressing any unresolved issues is critical in managing both your mental and physical wellbeing.
Electrical Industries Charity (EIC) appreciates how important it is for people in difficult moments to have a shoulder to lean on. Talking to someone in a safe and confidential setting is the best way for many people to relax enough and voice any concerns they may have. EIC offers a variety of support methods for people who are employed in the electrical industry through their Employer Assistance Programme (EAP).
With the EAP and specifically the Employee and Family Programme, John has overcome a challenging period in his life. John is Head of Sales for a large electrical wholesaler and travels extensively. He had been married for 22 years but felt that he and his wife no longer had anything in common and that their relationship had deteriorated. As such, John was feeling depressed and trapped in his marriage, particularly given they had three young children together.
John took the agonising decision to end his marriage with his wife. She asked him if there was anything that they could to do make it work but he felt that in his heart that there was no way back. John still cared for his wife and as there was no real trigger to the end of their relationship, he began to feel guilty. Shortly after, guilt manifested in every area of his life, affecting his work, sleep and diet. His physical and emotional state was noticeable to those around him and this made things even harder on his wife who saw how John was behaving. His employer was concerned about the change in John’s behaviour and contacted EIC for help. The Charity got in touch with John who offered him counselling.
Counselling was highly beneficial to John as it gave him precious time to reflect on what had happened over the years as well as in recent times. This made him realise that sometimes things just don’t work out despite both of your best intentions. He learned to understand that there are two sides to a story and both he and his wife had their faults along the way but it was important not to absorb all of the guilt.
This gave John the opportunity to forgive himself, not dwell on the circumstances and to move on - leaving the guilt in the past. This was vital in not prolonging the pain for his wife in the process. John and his wife are now going through an amicable divorce.
Emotional turmoil can impact everyone in different ways but it is essential to manage your emotions and wellbeing, especially when you face hard times such as a relationship breakdown.